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Welcome!
Thank you and welcome to The Satiristan disclaimer page! You are here because either you were offended or you thought that one of the posts was actually true! Either way, you need some help and this should explain some things:
- Satiristan.com is strictly a fake news, comical and satirical website. All articles are light years away from reality and are totally fake.
- Our articles are not intended to be offensive or insensitive, but if you still find them to be, then there's nothing much that we can do about it other than apologizing to you in advance. We believe, just like with cancer, there's no treatment for getting offended yet.
- All articles, names, incidents and descriptions of people are fictitious except for those of public figures who are the subject of humor and satire. Any resemblance to actual persons or events is purely coincidental.
- If you wish to submit an article or story, then first of all, please make sure that it's totally fake. Any article submissions to The Satiristan will be reviewed and edited by our team of editors, as we see fit, prior to submission. All article submissions should be the submitter's original content and not taken from elsewhere. No plagiarism please. For article submission, please contact us.
- Please visit our Privacy Policy for any questions about respecting personal information and privacy while visiting our site.
Disclaimer
This disclaimer ("Disclaimer", "Agreement") is an agreement between Waqas Khan Productions LLC ("Satiristan", "us", "we" or "our") and you ("User", "you" or "your"). This Disclaimer sets forth the general guidelines, terms and conditions of your use of the satiristan.com website and any of its products or services (collectively, "Website" or "Services").
Representation
Any views or opinions represented on the Website belong solely to the Content creators and do not represent those of people, institutions or organizations that Satiristan or creators may or may not be associated with in professional or personal capacity, unless explicitly stated. Any views or opinions are not intended to malign any religion, ethnic group, club, organization, company, or individual.
Content and Postings
You may not modify, print or copy any part of the Website. Inclusion of any part of this Website in another work, whether in printed or electronic or another form or inclusion of any part of the Website in another website by embedding, framing or otherwise without the express permission of Satiristan is prohibited.
You may submit comments for the available Content on the Website. By uploading or otherwise making available any information to Satiristan, you grant Satiristan the unlimited, perpetual right to distribute, display, publish, reproduce, reuse and copy the information contained therein. You may not impersonate any other person through the Website. You may not post content that is defamatory, fraudulent, obscene, threatening, invasive of another person's privacy rights or that is otherwise unlawful. You may not post content that infringes on the intellectual property rights of any other person or entity. You may not post any content that includes any computer virus or other code designed to disrupt, damage, or limit the functioning of any computer software or hardware. By submitting or posting Content on the Website, you grant Satiristan the right to edit and, if necessary, remove any Content at any time and for any reason.
Compensation and Sponsorship
This Website accepts forms of advertising, sponsorship, paid insertions or other forms of compensation. Satiristan is compensated to provide opinion on products, services, websites and various other topics. Even though Satiristan receives compensation for our posts or advertisements, we always give our honest opinions, findings, beliefs, or experiences on those topics or products. The views and opinions expressed on the Website are purely of Satiristan. Any product claim, statistic, quote or other representation about a product or service should be verified with the manufacturer, provider or party in question. Sponsored content, advertising space or post will always be identified as such. Some of the links on the Website may be "affiliate links". This means if you click on the link and purchase an item, Satiristan will receive an affiliate commission.
Fitness and Medical Disclaimer
The information available on the Website is for general health information only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. You should not rely exclusively on information provided on the Website for your health needs. All specific medical questions should be presented to your own health care provider and you should seek medical advice regarding your health and before starting any nutrition, weight loss or any other type of workout program.
If you choose to use the information available on the Website without prior consultation with and consent of your physician, you are agreeing to accept full responsibility for your decisions and agreeing to hold harmless Satiristan, its agents, employees, contractors, and any affiliated companies from any liability with respect to injury or illness to you or your property arising out of or connected with your use of this information.
There may be risks associated with participating in activities presented on the Website for people in good or poor health or with pre-existing physical or mental health conditions. If you choose to participate in these risks, you do so of your own free will and accord, knowingly and voluntarily assuming all risks associated with such activities.
The results obtained from the information available on the Website may vary, and will be based on your individual background, physical health, previous experience, capacity, ability to act, motivation and other variables. There are no guarantees concerning the level of success you may experience.
Not Legal Advice
The information provided on the Website is for general information purposes only and is not an alternative to legal advice from your lawyer, other professional services provider, or expert. It is not intended to provide legal advice or opinions of any kind. You should not act, or refrain from acting, based solely upon the information provided on the Website without first seeking appropriate legal or other professional advice. If you have any specific questions about any legal matter, you should consult your lawyer, other professional services provider, or expert. You should never delay seeking legal advice, disregard legal advice, or commence or discontinue any legal action because of the information on the Website.
The information on the Website is provided for your convenience only. This information may have no evidentiary value and should be checked against official sources before it is used for any purposes. It is your responsibility to determine whether this information is admissible in a given judicial or administrative proceeding and whether there are any other evidentiary or filing requirements. Your use of this information is at your own risk.
Not Financial Advice
The information on the Website is provided for your convenience only and is not intended to be treated as financial, investment, tax, or other advice. Nothing contained on the Website constitutes a solicitation, recommendation, endorsement, or offer by Satiristan, its agents, employees, contractors, and any affiliated companies to buy or sell any securities or other financial instruments.
All Content on this site is the information of a general nature and does not address the circumstances of any particular individual or entity. Nothing on the Website constitutes professional and/or financial advice, nor does any information on the Website constitute a comprehensive or complete statement of the matters discussed or the law relating thereto. You alone assume the sole responsibility of evaluating the merits and risks associated with the use of any information or other content on the Website before making any decisions based on such information. You agree not to hold Satiristan, its agents, employees, contractors, and any affiliated companies liable for any possible claim for damages arising from any decision you make based on the information made available to you through the Website.
Not Investment Advice
All investments are highly speculative in nature and involve substantial risk of loss. We encourage everyone to invest very carefully. We also encourage investors to get personal advice from your professional investment advisor and to make independent investigations before acting on information found on the Website. We do not in any way whatsoever warrant or guarantee the success of any action you take in reliance on statements or information available on the Website.
Past performance is not necessarily indicative of future results. All investments carry significant risk and all investment decisions of an individual remain the specific responsibility of that individual. There is no guarantee that systems, indicators, or signals will result in profits or that they will not result in full or partial losses. All investors are advised to fully understand all risks associated with any kind of investing they choose to do.
Reviews and Testimonials
Testimonials are received in various forms through a variety of submission methods. They are individual experiences, reflecting experiences of those who have used products or services on the Website in some way or another. However, they are individual results and results do vary. We do not claim that they are typical results that consumers will generally achieve. The testimonials are not necessarily representative of all of those who will use our products or services. Satiristan is not responsible for the opinions or comments posted on the Website, and does not necessarily share them. People providing testimonials on the Website may have been compensated with free products or discounts for use of their experiences. All opinions expressed are strictly the views of the poster or reviewer.
Some testimonials may have been edited for clarity, or shortened in cases where the original testimonial included extraneous information of no relevance to the general public. Testimonials may be reviewed for authenticity before they are posted for public viewing.
Indemnification and warranties
While we have made every attempt to ensure that the information contained on the Website is correct. Satiristan is not responsible for any errors or omissions, or for the results obtained from the use of this information. All information and Services on the Website are provided "as is", with no guarantee of completeness, accuracy, timeliness or of the results obtained from the use of this information or Services, and without warranty of any kind, express or implied. In no event will Satiristan, or its partners, employees or agents, be liable to you or anyone else for any decision made or action taken in reliance on the information on the Website or Services, or for any consequential, special or similar damages, even if advised of the possibility of such damages. Furthermore, information contained on the Website and any pages linked to and from it are subject to change at any time and without warning.
We reserve the right to modify this Disclaimer relating to the Website, products or services at any time, effective upon posting of an updated version of this Disclaimer on the Website. When we do we will revise the updated date at the bottom of this page. Continued use of the Website after any such changes shall constitute your consent to such changes.
Acceptance of this Disclaimer
You acknowledge that you have read this Disclaimer and agree to all its terms and conditions. By accessing the Website you agree to be bound by this Disclaimer. If you do not agree to abide by the terms of this Disclaimer, you are not authorized to use or access the Website.
Contacting Us
If you would like to contact us to understand more about this Disclaimer or wish to contact us concerning any matter relating to it, you may send an email to info@satiristan.com.
This document was last updated on June 23, 2020
